Mama’s Blog Life

And where’s she been?

Doin’ life.

But ignoring her loyal readers — for shame — sorry Mom and Dad!

No more.

To blog is to be.

Bookmark to

photo credit: LWY

AND WE CAN’T RESTORE IT.

The following is a cautionary tale about the perils of opening a Pandora’s box of technology without knowing what’s locked inside.

My son brought his IPod Touch home after hanging out at a friend’s house, and it was behaving very badly. The screen was scrolling code, specifically “BSD root: mdo, major 2, minor1.” Looked pretty bad to me. (Yeah, I know, some of you have already diagnosed the problem –but I just wasn’t THERE yet, and had to figure it out the loooooong way.)

I asked my son what he’d been doing right before it happened. His buddy was trying to download screensavers for him. OK. Whatever. Stuff appears on my kids’ IPods — music, tv shows, monster dunks on You Tube — and I assume they know what they’re doing. After all, they’re young. They’re supposed to know how to do this stuff.

Anyway. . . My first assumption was that the little darlings had managed to download a virus.

So I tried to hook the IPod up to ITunes, and ITunes pretended the Touch didn’t exist. The BSD error just stayed on the screen. Well. That little experiment was the limit of my know-how. “It’s beyond me,” I confessed. No one was surprised.

I told my older son to figure it out. He looked at me like I was crazy. “Well, what? Can’t you at least try?” I said.

“Mom. I’d only do what you just did. That things fu.. . I mean, jacked up.” He looked meaningfully at me. “Duuude.”

Well, he’s the closest thing in the family to a computer geek, so I figured we were going to have to outsource work on this BSD error.

Considering the fact that the Touch was only four months old, I was calm. I remembered that my mom had bought a three-year service plan for $75.00 from Target when she bought the IPod Touch for her beloved grandson’s birthday.

So my first move was to call the number Target provided with the service plan. I spoke with a Target service representative named Kimberly. Very friendly. I told her about the BSD error on the IPod Touch screen, and then she told me that she was going to connect me to Apple support, since the Touch is still under its year-long Apple warranty.

I was connected to an Apple support guy. I told him that Target had transferred me. “Yeah,” he said. “They don’t want to have to deal with it if they don’t have to.” I figured. “But here at Apple we’re always happy to help.”

“Good, ’cause I need it.”

I told him about the BSD error we were seeing on the IPod Touch screen.

“Uh Oh. Sounds like it could have been hacked by third party system.”

I told him about the attempt to download screensavers.

“Wow, yeah.” he said. “And, unfortunately, if a device has been hacked, it voids the Apple IPod warranty.” Of course. Apple doesn’t want to have to replace gadgets that are being used for nefarious non-Apple purposes.

My service rep had hope that we could restore the device over the phone, though. He had me unplug the ITouch from the USB cable, and power it off by holding the power button and the home button at the same time. Then I held the home button down while re-attaching the Touch to the USB cable. This little bit of magic pulled up a screen showing an arrow pointing towards the ITunes symbol. My service rep got pretty excited. He then walked me through restoring the ITouch on ITunes (this means that ITunes wipes out everything on the Touch and then installs the most recent software on the device). I have to admit I was getting pretty excited, as well. It looked like I’d be able to restore the IPod!

What a hero I’d be if my son came home from school, and I could tell him his Mama had saved his IPod Touch.

We got to the end of the restore session.

And got this message: “This IPod cannot be restored.”

F*******k!

“Hmmmm. That’s not good.” The Apple service rep was bummed.

All he could do at that point was set me up to ship the IPod to an Apple service center, so the technicians could look at it. If they decide it’s been hacked, we’re screwed. The best we can do at that point is purchase a new IPod Touch for $149.00 (plus shipping) under the Auto-Warranty Blah Blah. So he’s arranged for a shipping box to be delivered to me — I can ship the Touch off and await news of its fate. At least they’re paying the shipping.

I decided to call Target back. After all, we DO have the extended service plan with them. That should count for something, right? If Apple can’t help me (i. e. replace the FUBAR IPod), maybe Target can?

Somehow, I got Kimberly back on the phone. I reminded her about the BSD error and what was going on with our device, and explained that Apple’s IPod warranty is void if they determine our Touch was hacked. She put me on hold while she consulted her extended service plan bible for reference to hacking.

When she got back on the line, she told me that Target’s extended service plan covers only what Apple’s warranty covers.

What?

“OK, so you really can’t help me any more than Apple can in year one of your extended service plan, then. Is that what you’re saying?”

“Well, the service plan only covers what the Apple warranty covers.”

“Then wouldn’t it make sense that my three years with YOU should start after Apple’s one year warranty expires?”

“No, you have to purchase it within 90 days of the product purchase.”

“And it doesn’t do anything for me that Apple won’t do in the first year?”

“Our service plan covers everything in Apple’s warranty, and nothing else.”

“Does that seem like kind of a rip-off to you?”

She didn’t answer.

I got off the phone. I had been mainlining coffee as I learned, the long and slow and painful way, that my son’s IPod Touch was potentially jacked up beyond repair.

I went to work out.

When I returned, I was refreshed and energized. I had decided, somewhere between level 9 and 10 on the stairmaster, that I was going to tackle this problem myself. Online! I’d get help from geek blogs, You Tube geeks, any geeks.

I went to Google. In the course of my searches, I was able to INFER that ZiPhone was the source of our IPod Touch troubles. What is ZiPhone supposed to do? Designed for the IPhone, ZiPhone is supposed to liberate it from the restrictive clutches of Apple technology, that’s what! This process is known as the jailbreak. The ZiPhone Jailbreak. It allows the IPhone to advantage of third party fun stuff outside of the Apple goodies. I found out also that the that ZiPhone can also liberate/jailbreak the IPod Touch. Unfortunately, ZiPhone appeared to have liberated OUR device from usability. My suspicion was confirmed when my son got home and I asked him what he and his buddy were using when his IPod went crazy.

“He was showing me how to use ZiPhone to get screensavers. He used it for his IPhone.” Yeah.

So much for the ZiPhone jailbreak.

Undeterred, I visited several You Tube and blog tutorials that described how to restore our IPod Touch. All involved the holding down of power and home keys to power off the device and then power it back on. Only now, the same “BSD” screen comes on no matter how many times I power on and off. About a hundred times. . . and counting.

Aaaaaargh.

So it’s 8:00PM, and I’m done with Operation IPod Rescue for now.

Time to clear my head with a glass of wine. And I’ll raise my glass in cheers.

Cheers to Apple for the technology that spurns all others (and the warranty to back it up!); cheers to Target for a surreally stupid service plan (and for ripping off my mom); and cheers to ZiPhone for their guerilla liberation tactics (understood well by geeks, but not so well by your average Mama).

Bookmark to

Before my kids became teenagers, I was still using the same worn-out old slang phrases I’d been carting around for years. I’d tell my kids to “chill out” and “stop trippin” when they were “acting up.” If I liked something, it was “cool.” Otherwise, it could be a “bummer.”

I don’t think I’ll ever stop using such tried and true words and phrases. But I’m hip enough to know I’ve gotta keep up with the times. So I’ve updated my slang, thanks to a whole new set of fun slang words and phrases that I’ve learned from my kids.

I’m sure you have an interest in being as hip as I am, so I’ll share with you a beginners list of de rigeur slang. Use these phrases wisely, and you might be elevated to the status of “the cool parent.” Don’t have kids whose friends you want to impress? Use these words and phrases to increase your mystique and make other adults envious of how “tight” (cool) you are.

My Bad: Def. I made a mistake, I recognize that mistake, and I’m sorry.

Who said “sorry” is the hardest word? Who cares? You don’t have to use it anymore. Replace wimpy, whiny “I’m sorry” with “my bad,” and you’ll get automatic r-e-s-p-e-c-t, even in the face of massive screw-ups. Hint for enhanced cred: When you tell someone “my bad,” make sure you indicate yourself by patting your chest with your open hand. That way, they know you know it’s truly YOUR bad and you have the cojones to admit it.

Real Talk: Def. Telling the blunt and honest truth.

This term is often used to differentiate someone who is not only telling the truth, but also stands in stark contrast to those around him or her who are not as straightforward.

Recently, my daughter told me that she wants Obama for President because he’s “on that real talk,” and doesn’t “bulls**t” around like Clinton and McCain.

Jacked Up: Def. Thoroughly messed up.

I love this term. So handy, so useful, so many applications. Hell, for teenagers, anything can be jacked up. . . a too-short haircut, a friend’s unfortunate choice of outfit, the house after that party you held while the parents were gone.

Now think about the possibilities for yourself. Perhaps you owe some taxes this year, even though you’re living paycheck to paycheck? That’s jacked up! Your cell phone fell in the toilet because you’re so busy you can’t even stop to pee? Now your phone’s jacked up. Your kid wrecked the car? Yep. It’s jacked up, too.

Come at Me Sideways: Def. Approaching a person in a disrespectful manner.

One day, my daughter came home from school with a scowl on her face.

“What’s wrong with you?” I innocently asked.

“Dude. I’m just sick of people comin’ at me sideways all the time.”

“Hmmm,” I thought. “Who came at you sideways and how did they do it?”

“This man Tyrell came up to me and told me he heard I was talking to Matt over at JC’s party last weekend. I said ‘don’t come at me sideways with that mess.’ If he’s gonna believe what he hears, he’s got it bent, twisted AND sideways.”

“Okay. Sounds like you took care of him, then.”

“Still, I hate when people come at me sideways with a bunch of mess.”

I think you can see the possibilities for this rich (and somewhat comical) phrase!

Puttin Me on Blast: Def. To call someone out in public.

Have you ever sat in a meeting and had someone point a finger at you because you didn’t do some silly little to-do that was assigned in some endless meeting that generated so many to-dos that you couldn’t keep track and then when the minutes came out, you didn’t actually read them? There you sit, scribbling a meal plan and the groceries you’re going to pick up on the way home, when you’re forced to attention because it’s been made known that you didn’t finish the pie chart or whatever. Now you can take control of the situation by asking the little brown-nosing snitch who ratted you out, “Why you puttin me on blast up here in front of everyone?” This will redirect the attention from you and your (rare) dereliction of duty and onto the person who everyone now will see as a petty little climber who’s willing to step on the backs of his/her colleagues to move up the ladder.

Posted Up: Def. Situated in a certain position

This is NOT like posting up, or being posted up, by an opponent in a basketball game. Take that image out of your head. Picture instead someone taking up a certain space in a certain position. A person can be posted up pretty much anywhere. On the couch, at the dinner table, at your computer.

You can especially be posted up by the front door waiting when your kid breaks curfew.

a Minute: Def. A long time.

The phrase “a minute” is a clever turnabout of meaning, because what the utterer REALLY means is “a long time.” If you haven’t seen someone since last summer, you could say “I haven’t seen you in a minute.” Hint: it sounds better if you say “I AIN’T seen you in a minute.”

I recently had to call my husband’s attention to the fact that he hadn’t done his share of the laundry in “a minute.” He replied that he’d get right on it. . . in “a minute.”

You see just how very useful this phrase can be.

Blowin Up My Phone: Def. Calling a person a lot on their phone.

A few days ago, I was looking for our house phone, which had disappeared from it’s base. I found it upstairs, attached to my older son’s ear.

“Why are you using the house phone? You have a cell phone.”

He covered the mouthpiece. “Naw, though, mom.” He pointed at the house phone. “This girl was blowin up my cell phone. But I need it to text. So we’re talking on this phone.”

I’m sure you’ve had people blowin up your phone before, right? Unfortunately, for adults, the ones blowing up our phones are the people you don’t really want to hear from THAT much: your boss, telemarketers, bill collectors, your kids when they need money.

Beast: Def. A person who excels at something, particularly in sports.

Not only can one BE “a beast,” one can also engage in the act of beasting, as in “He was beastin’ on the court.” This handy word can also be used as an adjective: “That was a beast move.”

In think there are endless possibilities beyond the sports world, as well, because you can really be a beast at anything, can’t you?

“Mom’s a beast on the computer. She’s writing all the time.”

“Dad busted a beast move on them ribs.”

“Obama’s beastin on the campaign trail.”

Hater: Def. A jealous person who gossips and/or down-talks about others.

My daughter is a true aficionado when it comes to the various uses of the word “hater.” According to her, haters are everywhere. Haters who hate. Haters who be hatin. Haters do things like “put your business on blast because they’re jealous” and “come at you sideways with stuff thats none of their business.”

Do you have haters in your life? Turn the tables, put THEM on blast, and ask ‘em “Why you drinkin all that haterade, man?”

Special props (thanks) to my daughter, Quent, for her help with all of the above.

That’s it for now. I hope you’ll be able to find ways to use these words and phrases in your daily conversation. And stay tuned for future updates on more handy slang!

Until then,

Deuces (Goodbye)

Bookmark to

I know I’m late to the table on this one, but I’m getting a huge kick out of it. I got RickRolled last night.

What is RickRolling, some of you might ask? RickRolling is an example of what makes the internet truly great. It where viral marketing meets the prank phone call, and it’s been building up steam over the past year. In short, it’s an online prank that’s resurrected the uber-80’s pop hit “Never Gonna Give You Up,” by Rick Astley.

I’d totally forgotten about it.

I’m almost embarrassed to say how I got RickRolled. I was internetting around and landed on perezhilton.com, where I came across a headline that promised to show video footage of Whitney Houston smoking crack. Well. I remembered how Whitney once stated rather too emphatically in an interview with Diane Sawyer that crack was “too cheap,” and that she “makes too much money to ever smoke crack.” Not that I cared too much about a rich Diva’s drug of choice, but I thought at the time, “Whitney, thou doth protest too much.”

So I thought I’d just take a little peek at the offered video link. Hey, it was late, and I had had a glass of wine. A little junk food for the brain can be fun, right? So I hit the link. No Whitney scoop. Just a blast from my 80’s past.

Now I can’t get that song out of my head.

Bookmark to

It’s Friday Night! I’m feeding my basketball jones by gorging on the NCAA men’s tournament games, but there are enough ads on that I have plenty of time to get this post together and share some of my favorite reading over the past couple of days.

Grab a glass of your favorite wine and start linking — these are all great reading!

My Dad sent me this one. Very interesting (and biting) commentary by Greg Palast, linking (no pun intended)this week’s bailout of predator banks with the recent outing of Eliot Spitzer as consumer of high-end (or, at least, high-priced, prostitutes). Thanks for the link, you crazy old liberal!

I ran across this one on Wonkette last night. Turns out, Jeremiah Wright, recently reviled former Obama pastor, was a guest in the Clinton White House. Yes, that’s Bill Clinton, husband of Hillary. Stay tuned for Hillary’s Speech on Race. . .

And today the cunning Obama has mind-melded members of the Fox News Team. Talk about the candidate of hope and change! Who would have thought that Obama would be able to sow the seeds of rebellion within Fox News, that bastion of knee-jerk conservatism. Check out The Huffington Post and (the always hilarious) Wonkette for their take on Fox anchors Chris Wallace and Brian Kilmeade speaking out against their own network’s/colleagues’ vendetta against Obama.

Also today, featured on Anderson Cooper’s 360 blog: CNN contributor Roland Martin is actually taking the time to listen to Jeremiah Wright’s speeches, and is helpfully providing some context for and commentary on the speeches that contain the clips that have been played repeatedly in an attempt to portray Wright and, by extension, Obama, as un-American and untrustworthy. Today, he discussed the Reverend Wright’s 9/11 sermon and the “God Damn America” sermon.

And on Politico: here’s a reality check for everyone who still thinks (hopes) the Democratic nomination is still in play. Despite all evidence and expert opinion to the contrary, the Clinton campaign continues to behave as if their girl can WIN the nomination. Not quite — it will take an act of superdelegate subversion of the citizens’ will in order for her to be the Democratic nominee.

Happy Friday!

Bookmark to

Obama’s got a brilliant mind and a beautiful speaking voice, and he used both to full effect yesterday as he engaged with his fellow citizens on a subject few others in public life are willing, or able, to speak forthrightly about under any circumstances, much less when their own political fortunes are at stake. In a speech he wrote by himself, he was fearless in coming forward and pointing straight at the racial divide, challenging all of us to recognize how very separate Black and White America all still are, while offering the hope that we can all yet embrace our common humanity and our allegiance to our nation, throw our judgements aside, and work together for true change.

And the pure beauty is that he did it with straightforward, real talk. No one had to red between the lines. It was a speech unlike any other I’ve heard in my lifetime, and one that has the power to truly evolve us.

Here’s to hope. Here’s to change.

Bookmark to

Andy Warhol once said: “In the future, everyone will be world-famous for 15 minutes.”

The internet has guaranteed that, now, maybe not everyone will be world-famous for 15 minutes, but everyone sure CAN be. And a young woman named Ms. Ashley Alexandra Dupre was last week’s poster child for Warhol’s famous statement.

Ms. Dupre’s 15 minutes were made possible by Eliot Spitzer, crusading independently wealthy ex-prosecutor turned governor of New York, who spent incredible amounts of money (up to $4,300.00 a pop — no pun intended) on unsafe sex with prostitutes, and, when exposed, took a nose dive right out of a soaring political career.

Given the circumstances, after all, isn’t it just a crap shoot of sorts, which hooker becomes America’s media darling? I guess she just happened to be the most recent.

While common sense says we should all have been (at least primarily) focused on the tragic, self-inflicted downfall of a man who was truly trying, as Governor of New York, to DO THE RIGHT THING, what it all came down to was this: the public really wanted to know exactly whose sex is worth thousands of dollars.

So, last week, as Spitzer was resigning in disgrace, we were all indulging our fascinated curiousity about Spitzer’s most recently commissioned call girl, Ashley Alexandra Dupre, AKA “Kristen” (for whose services Spitzer is reported to have paid $2,200.00). Born Ashley Youmans, her story went viral, and her market price spiked, as quickly as Spitzer fell like a lead balloon from grace.

The whole world could read the makings of a potential B-move drama about the young girl from a broken home who came to New York to be a recording artist, fell in with a pimp, and became a hooker, and THEN, due to her high-class hooker skills (and being in right/wrong place at the right/wrong time), unwittingly became the living, breathing symbol of the professional demise of a high-profile, crusading politician who just wouldn’t keep the snake in its cage.

Because everyone wanted to know exactly what kind of hooker is worth a political career, Ms. Dupre was everywhere. And she quickly capitalized in a big way.

Within two days of her “outing” as Kristen, Ms. Dupre posted two songs she recorded on the music site AmieStreet.com, which sells music for various prices based on demand. And despite the fact that the songs (”What We Want” and “Move Ya Body” — yes, I made myself listen to them) are pretty boring and derivative, they were in high enough demand to command the top price on the site, 98 cents. Her songs were the top two on the Buzzing Songs Today page at Amie Street. I know that put a few dollars in her purse.

Not to mention, Ashley’s MySpace page was getting multimillions of hits. And she’s getting the predictable offers to pose for Penthouse ($1 million — not bad for a working girl covered in tattoos) and other skin mags. Folks even speculated that there could be a book deal in the works, as well. Shudder.

This week, I don’t know about the rest of you, but I’m yawning. Her 15 minutes should be over by now, right? After all, if my husband, for instance, decided to spend thousands of dollars on Ms. Dupre, who would care? She wouldn’t even get 1 minute. But she won’t go away. And we’re now reduced to profiles of her as club-hopping, coke-sniffing, party girl, and reports about the possibility of her showing up on “Girls Gone Wild.” Is Penthouse still willing to pay $1 million for a cliche? If so, please hurry up and cash her out.

After all, New Jersey is offering us the revived McGreevey scandal to talk about, and it’s so much more titillating (read the link!). In fact, the McGreevey scandal was given new life because Dina Matos McGreevey felt compelled to come forward publicly to empathize with Silda Wall Spitzer, and welcome her to the Betrayed and Humiliated Political Wives Club. Which, in turn, compelled Jim McGreevey’s former driver, in an effort to keep things REAL and expose Matos McGreevey as a hypocrite, to go public about the three-way trysts he claims he used to have with the McGreeveys on Friday nights after dining at TGIFridays, and referred to be the threesome, oh-so-cleverly, as “Friday Night Specials.”

Not to mention, new New York governor David Paterson was not going to be outdone by the outgoing Spitzer. He admitted to having affairs during a time when his marriage was, shall we say, not doing so great. Turnabout is fair play, though, ’cause his wife had an affair, too! Fun for all.

So! We’re on a runaway freight train of sex scandal. Who’s next?!?

Update: I feel sooooo much better now that I got that out of my system!

Bookmark to

Many nightclubs earn a little extra money and begin breeding future consumers by holding “teen nights” on select days each week or month. One of these clubs in our area is Orlando’s Night Club, located in Olathe, Kansas.

A few nights ago, we gave our 15-year-old son permission to go to Orlando’s teen night. One of his friend’s parents were driving them there and back, so we didn’t have to worry about teens driving on the highway. We figured it was something different our kid could do during spring break, especially since our family is staying grounded during the break.

The club’s hours were 7-11Pm, and I asked my son to call when they were headed back. I got a call from him at about 10:15Pm. When I asked him if they were headed home, he told me that he had never gotten into the club at all, and was outside the club with his friend and some other kids waiting for parents to pick them up.

WTF?

Here’s what happened:

My son and his friends arrived at Orlando’s at about 8PM, after getting something to eat. There was a line to get in, and they were separated as they waited to get in. When my son got to the front of the line, he was stopped by a “bouncer,” a big white bald guy with a few earrings in his ears.

“You can’t come in here. Just look at you. You look like you’re in a gang.”

“What? I’m wearing a polo shirt. Isn’t that OK?” In fact, my son was wearing a very nice polo shirt with black, grey and blue stripes, tucked into a nice pair of black jeans, with new white basketball shoes.

“Yeah, well, the sleeves are too long. That’s gang-related.” For real?

Now, my kid is a big boy — 6′5″ and 190 pounds — so he definitely stands out wherever he goes. He also happens to be black, which will definitely make you stand out in Olathe.

My son, it turns out, wasn’t the only young black man in a polo shirt who was being turned away. There were at least 20 of them, and many of them were guys that my son knows from all of his years in sports. A veritable who’s who of athletes from Kansas City Metro area high schools were among the young black men turned away at the door for being dressed like gangstas.

The irony is that the “bouncer” either couldn’t or wouldn’t tell the boys WHAT the dress code actually is, when they asked him. He simply told them that they should know what’s appropriate and what’s not. Of course, his word choice, as reported to me, contained a number of curses at the boys and threats to call the police. At one point, he told my son to get lost and get walking — to which my son pointed out that it would be a little difficult for him to do that since he came all the way from Lawrence, 40 miles away. So the King of the Doorway backed off, and my son and the other kids retreated to a spot where they could visit until their rides came.

Now, while my son was at the door being treated to his first episode of racial profiling, a true coming of age event for young black men in this country, his (also black) friend had gotten in. My son called him to let him know what happened and the friend went back to the door to try to get his money back and go back outside. Needless to say, the club wouldn’t refund his money. After talking again, my son told his friend to go ahead and hang out for a while, since he was outside enjoying the company of the other profilees.

Well, it didn’t take long for my son’s friend to be asked to leave the club, after all. Because his belt was too thick and the buckle was too big. Yup — it was determined by the sharp-eyed security detail at Orlando’s to be a gang-related belt. You’re outta here, homie. And the friend wasn’t the only one kicked out. Another dozen or more young black men who had already paid money to get into the club were then kicked out for a variety of clothing-related issues, without getting their money refunded, of course.

After speaking with my son, I called the club and asked them right off the bat what their dress code is. The employee I spoke with could not or would not give me any dress code guidelines. He only said that clothing has to be appropriate. I asked him point-blank if polo shirts conformed to the dress code. He wouldn’t answer me.

I then described the situation my son had told me about. Instead of listening to my concerns, the guy basically called my son’s honesty into question and told me that they had the right to refuse entry to anyone for any reason. When I told him that the “bouncer” had cursed at kids and tried to make my son walk home, he answered that his doorman would never do such a thing. He also told me that there were police officers who monitor the door and are aware of everyone who gets turned away, and he offered to let me talk to one of them. Well, when I called that bluff, all of a sudden he didn’t want to go get the police officers. At that point, I had to laugh. When I asked several teen witnesses later about this claim that police officers were monitoring the door all night, they told me the only police officers they saw that night arrived after 10PM in response to a fight in the club.

I looked up reviews of Orlando’s after this incident, which is something I should have thought to do before letting my son go there. Several of the most recent reviews I could find online described the exact same racist, profiling tactics that my son described.

Well, here’s my son’s actual profile: he’s an honor student with a 3.5 GPA. He played football and basketball for his school this year, and is now a member of a traveling basketball team in Kansas City. He has been elected to represent his school for the past two years at the Black Leadership Symposium at KU, and is a respresentative on his school’s diversity panel, which is a group that educates community groups about cultural diversity. This is why profiling doesn’t work.

And if my son is the kind of person that Orlando’s can do without, I’d say that we could all do without Orlando’s. At least, I’m very thankful that not a penny of my hard-earned money got spent in there.

Bookmark to

To absolutely no one’s surprise Barack Obama won the Wyoming primary last Saturday.

And while Obama was winning in Wyoming, Bill Clinton was re-emphasizing his wife’s willingness to let front-runner Obama be HER vice presidential running mate. Obama, in Mississippi a couple of days later, stated the obvious in response to the Clinton’s continuing campaign to convince him to concede:

“With all due respect, I have won twice as many states as Senator Clinton. I have won more of the popular vote than Senator Clinton. I have more delegates than Senator Clinton. So I do not know how somebody who is in second place is offering the vice presidency to the person who is in first place.”

He also questioned why Clinton says she thinks he would make such a good vice president when she’s been running around talking about how he doesn’t have the experience to be president.

And then went on to win, predictably, Mississippi.

We also found out, officially, that Obama won the Texas caucuses. The result? Even though Clinton won the Texas primary, Obama ended up with more delegates.

So Clinton’s victories in the Ohio and Texas primaries have gained her no ground against Obama’s rising lead in the delegate count. Not that the Clinton campaign cares about all that. . . I suppose when the time comes, they’ll just expect that enough superdelegates will completely ignore the will of the people and anoint her Empress of Washington.

Even so, as of this date, the Clinton campaign is still trying valiantly to convince the press and the public that, despite his widening lead, the Obama campaign is losing ground. With some hilarious results.

And I’d be a real blogging slacker if I didn’t mention the true Clinton campaign Obama backlash gem of the week. . .

Geraldine Ferraro was compelled to call our attention to the fact that Barack Obama is Black

Ms. Ferraro shared with the LA Times her analysis of Obama’s success this primary season:

“If Obama was a white man, he would not be in this position. And if he was a woman (of any color) he would not be in this position. He happens to be very lucky to be who he is. And the country is caught up in the concept.”

Clinton took her time (two days) in apologizing for Ferraro’s denigrating and belittling statements about her opponent. And when she did, the floodgates opened.

Ferraro, on the other hand, did not apologize. Although, needless to say, she did resign. Not very gracefully, though. She’s pissed off. She thinks the Obama campaign had no business accusing her of racism. “If anybody is going to apologize, they should apologize to me for calling me a racist.”

Not that they called her a racist. I believe the words were “ridiculous” and “wrongheaded.” Freudian slip much, Gerry?

Need I say? I’ve lost ALL respect for Geraldine Ferraro.

And, in closing, I call your attention to the latest Clinton campaign un-reality check. . .

Mark Penn continues to provide comic relief in the midst of stressful primary campaigning, and I can’t portray it any better than Wonkette.

Bookmark to

will keep her afloat for now.

But even with her wins in the Ohio and Texas primaries, the fact remains that Obama is still ahead in the popular vote and still ahead in the pledged delegate count.

Much as the I’ve been loving the orgy of political participation inspired by the Clinton-Obama duel, my overriding hope (yes, I can. . . hope) was for Obama to put the nomination to bed last night. That’s because he’s my choice.

But people are passionately fired up on both sides and nobody’s stepping back from the line in the sand. People want their say, so now Wisconsin, Mississippi and Pennsylvania are gonna get theirs.

We seem to be moving inexorably toward an electoral stalemate in the Democratic nominating process.  Which leads to some speculation:

The Obama-Clinton Dynamic Duo Dream Team Dream Ticket

Hillary’s making coy suggestions that the party could be moving toward a combo ticket with her name at the top:

“That may , you know, be where this is headed , but of course we have to decide who’s on top of the ticket. . . I think the people of Ohio very clearly said it should be me.” (From CBS’ “The Early Show”)

This is a somewhat clumsy psycho-political maneuver to use the Ohio victory to give overdog Obama the underdog status. But no one’s biting in the Obama camp. Maybe because the guy who’s got the popular vote and the delegate count is thinking he should be at the top of the ticket?

And maybe isn’t so warm to the idea of Vice-President(s) Clinton breathing down his neck?

12:25PM Not-So-Breaking News

President George just endorsed former foe McCain as his party’s nominee.

The headline on CNN is “McCain to get push from Bush.”

Predictable yakkety-yak says this is good for McCain because Bush has the backing of the more conservative Republicans who don’t trust or like McCain. But there are a hell of lot more Americans who don’t like Bush than do right now. And McCain looked, shall we say, unenthusiastic? standing at the podium with Cowboy George.

Anyway, whether they like McCain or not, I’d guess that the deeply conservative faction of the Republican party will be stampeding to the polls in November if for no other reason than to try to keep Obama or Clinton or Obama/Clinton out of the White House.

Bookmark to